hi hi hi! I have pretty much moved permanently to DW, and only just noticed that this came up in my rss reader. Your LJ is one of the few I RSS, but I almost always forget to check this folder. *facepalm*
I am so glad to see a post from you, if only to know that you're still out there. I'd be sad if I lost you completely, even if you're not enjoying fandom anymore. Don't leave me, Gwen!
Honestly, I'd wondered why, as the days went by, you had disappeared. I'd hoped it was because RL was busy, but in a good way. A small part wondered and feared if it had to do with your big bang and its reception. I'm sorry, love. There's almost nothing that feels worse than seeing yourself critiqued by those with no fear of reprisal. It's rough. I feel like I let you down around bb. I should have pushed you harder or been more insistent as a beta. But I was afraid that I'd upset you. :( I'm sorry. If you, in the future, feel like you may need a beta again, I humbly offer my services, and a promise to be better.
I know what you mean about being burned out. I've had a similar experience. I just lost all perspective on fandom and its place in my life. I came to fear judgment from fellow fen, and let it cripple my ability to communicate. (I'm not saying this is your story, just that it happened to me.) After stepping away for a while, and allowing myself to follow my fannish fancies wherever they may lead, I feel little more refreshed now. I may even make a post! (watch out. ;))
I still love the Angel/JDM you wrote for me. And so many of your stories from last year. I can't believe it's been 6 years!
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I am so glad to see a post from you, if only to know that you're still out there. I'd be sad if I lost you completely, even if you're not enjoying fandom anymore. Don't leave me, Gwen!
Honestly, I'd wondered why, as the days went by, you had disappeared. I'd hoped it was because RL was busy, but in a good way. A small part wondered and feared if it had to do with your big bang and its reception. I'm sorry, love. There's almost nothing that feels worse than seeing yourself critiqued by those with no fear of reprisal. It's rough. I feel like I let you down around bb. I should have pushed you harder or been more insistent as a beta. But I was afraid that I'd upset you. :( I'm sorry. If you, in the future, feel like you may need a beta again, I humbly offer my services, and a promise to be better.
I know what you mean about being burned out. I've had a similar experience. I just lost all perspective on fandom and its place in my life. I came to fear judgment from fellow fen, and let it cripple my ability to communicate. (I'm not saying this is your story, just that it happened to me.) After stepping away for a while, and allowing myself to follow my fannish fancies wherever they may lead, I feel little more refreshed now. I may even make a post! (watch out. ;))
I still love the Angel/JDM you wrote for me. And so many of your stories from last year. I can't believe it's been 6 years!