electricalgwen: (Default)
I've had a few, fortunately relatively short, periods away from LJ in the past. They were all associated with restricted computer access - laptop died, moving/travelling/otherwise lacking Internet-I-could-come-here-with - and even though I missed LJ, there was always a brief but odd reluctance to come back. I knew I'd never catch up with things, whether fic or conversations or episode squee; it was easier to ignore it, for a little while longer. A day or two, at most, and then I'd accept that I was out of touch, check in with friends, read the latest, and move on.

This time, I dropped off the radar on July 25, and...just never came back.

I was tired. I was unhappy with my J2 big bang this year: I didn't have enough time or energy to devote to it, and I avoided it for too long after getting badly stuck, until I wrote probably half of it in a desperate last-minute struggle not to let my artist down, and it showed. To me, and to others, and I let a few negative comments get to me. I was struggling with other stuff I was supposed to write - still am /o\ - and there were some big things out in the real world I had to organize and deal with. LJ was mostly making me feel guilty, so I avoided it. As a result, the break caused by a brief internet-free vacation kept getting longer and longer, and it got harder and harder to come back.

A lot of the above is still true. I'm still struggling with writing, and with having time to write, and with reading anything at all. But I miss you guys. And today's my sixth anniversary on LJ, and the day I usually do an annual round-up, so here I am again. I hope can find a better balance in 2012.


What I Did Last Year, by Gwen

Supernatural

sink or swim - Sam/Dean, PG-13, ~3200 words. Written for [livejournal.com profile] apreludetoanend.

Involves a water elemental and angst. This took a long time to come together but I like the style of it: less dialogue, more description, and maybe darker/deeper than usual.


Dolor Ibi Est - Gen Sam & Dean, PG-13, ~8500 words. Written for [livejournal.com profile] de_nugis in the [livejournal.com profile] ohsam hurt/comfort challenge.

I had fun with this one, both the plot and Dean's wild stories.


put it in your pocket - Sam & Dean, PG, ~1000 words. Written for the prompt "better with you" at [livejournal.com profile] silverbullets.

Because there's never enough stargazing.


day springs eternal - Sam/Dean, R, 1376 words. Written for the prompt "hope springs eternal" at [livejournal.com profile] spnspringfling.

Mystery Spot twist. Angst, but with a touch of hope. Dean keeps dying, and Sam keeps doing something stupid. I imagine everyone has to write Mystery Spot fic eventually.


get outta the kitchen - Sam/Dean, R, 2650 words. Written for [livejournal.com profile] dancetomato. Sex pollen fic from Bobby's POV, with bonus!Castiel.

This is far and away the most popular thing I have ever written. I'm glad it made so many people laugh! A companion piece from Dean's POV has been in the works for far too long. *apologies to DT*


CW RPF

Give A Dog A Bone - J2 AU, PG-13, ~10K words. Written for [livejournal.com profile] j2_everafter, loosely inspired by the Black Cauldron.

Crack, mild schmoop, cliches, improbable science, Eilonwy!Jensen and Assistant Dogwalker Jared. Yeah.


Black Flag Over Texas - J2 AU, NC-17, ~32K words. Written for [livejournal.com profile] spn_j2_bigbang.

Prequel to last year's story Green Means Go. If you haven't read either and are considering them, I'd suggest starting with last year's. I think it's more enjoyable that way. Both involve suspense, hidden identities, dystopian politics and Jensen being awesome. Also explosions, if you like that sort of thing.


Other:

In Plain Sight - Spike/Xander, ~850 words. Written for [livejournal.com profile] eyezrthewindows.

I wrote this in a fit of last-minute inspiration. It was nice to revisit these guys for a little while.

And finally, a snippet of Angel/JDM, for [livejournal.com profile] laisserais.

I can't write either of these guys. Really. But somehow, they wanted to brood at talk to fuck each other.


It turns out I wrote about as much this past year as I did the year before - all in the first half of the year! No wonder I burned out, I guess.

Incidentally, I did a year-in-review round-up last year, which nobody commented on. This was only mildly surprising, and so it was not until some time later that I realized one contributing factor was that it was locked and misdated. *facepalm* Not that you don't already have a million things to read - I certainly do - but in case you're interested in what I wrote in 2010 and my thoughts on it, it's available.

See you around, I hope! ♥

drive-by

Apr. 6th, 2011 09:26 pm
electricalgwen: (spn blackeyedsam)
Apparently LJ has been under some kind of DDoS? And has been down a lot? I completely failed to notice, that's how busy the last ten days have been. ARGH.

Somebody must have vidded SPN to INXS's "Devil Inside," y/y? Because OMG DO WANT.
electricalgwen: (xmas star)
So, I never do things like this. (And not only because I'm secretly afraid no one will comment. *g*) But I put my name in for the Secret Santa Holiday Love Meme here just now because today was really really emotionally rough and I could use some anonymous love. (Er. Virtually speaking, I mean.)
electricalgwen: (river buh)
*blink*

It's cold and raining and a guy with sandals and greaves and a short sword and a breastplate and bare thighs just ran past my house. That's dedication. I could barely stand to get out from under my flannel sheets and electric blanket.
electricalgwen: (QoW Read)
Work is chewing me up. I've gotten home around midnight for the past four days, and a couple of them started at 7 am. Today was a little easier but still busy, and tomorrow promises to be more of the same. And it's not just that it's been busy; it's been busy with tough, technically demanding, emotionally distressing stuff.

I am way behind on LJ and also on writing, and next weekend I have to give an hour long talk to a bunch of people who I suspect currently know nearly as much as I do about what I'm going to talk about, so I have to do a pile of research before writing up the talk. I had hopes of doing it this weekend but. Ha. Also, I haven't yet seen SPN 6.03.

The rest of the family have gone away to relatives for Thanksgiving, which I told them to do because I was going to be busy and no fun at all, but it's still a wee bit sad. I'm eating freshly-made guacamole in an empty house and when I stop crunching my Tostitos, I can hear funny noises in the backyard. I hope it's raccoons.

On the plus side, I had a nice bath and beta-read something good. :)
electricalgwen: (spn boysoncar)
I can't write a coda to that, at least not now - I refer you to the incredible Fleshflutter and the legendary Chash, or this wonderful 'Year of the Living Dead'.

But anyone who's seen the ending may understand the impulse that prompted me to go find this haiku I wrote some months ago at [livejournal.com profile] spnroundtable, which I'd been meaning to put up here anyway. If not, well. Enjoy anyway.


Hunting’s in their blood.
Even had Azazel not
added his blood too,

they’d have ended up
on these roads, these ghost-ridden
creature-tortured paths.

Someone has to be
the guardian, standing tall
against the shadows.

They are the blades, the
guns, the cleansing flames. They are
weapons incarnate

from earliest days,
both of them, primed and pointed,
aimed into the dark.



P.S. and/or WARNING: I do not expect/intend that comments will be kept spoiler-free.
electricalgwen: (dean bad day)
I think I've set a new personal record by mostly sleeping for the last 36 hours. Everyone else in the family had stomach flu. I didn't have the typical symptoms, just felt half-dead and feverish and strung out on cytokines. Blech.

When not sleeping, I caught up on a few things on LJ (I still have half-a-zillion tabs open) and here are a few things I felt like sharing (unlike the stomach flu.)

[livejournal.com profile] beatonna is always excellent but these Canadian Stereotype Comics are much fun.

Centuries out of date in Internet time, but On Women's Gold and Equality is worth a glance, imo.

If you didn't see yesterday's xkcd, Porn For Women is a must-read.

I have been watching this HP character afghan come out square by square. Wow. That's a lot of work.

I have made zero progress on bigbang. :(
electricalgwen: (spn anna)
I just learned that Kage Baker died at the end of January.

Her Company novels are marvelous science fiction: intelligent, real, witty, and often doing the unexpected or pushing something just a teeny bit farther than I thought she would, or than I would have been comfortable with. She made me think, theorize, laugh, exclaim, and occasionally squirm. Her fantasy writing is equally compelling and full of delicious, sneaky humour.

A couple of my favourite things about visiting San Francisco were getting to see the places she described - much of the Company series takes place in and around there - and managing to pick up a couple of her newer books during an excellent bookstore pilgrimage with [livejournal.com profile] madame_meretrix, before they'd made it to my local.

She will be missed.
electricalgwen: (bsg cylon xmas)
I finally have a moment to myself to sit down and really panic about finishing my [livejournal.com profile] spn_j2_xmas fic, and while this was probably not going to go well anyway, THE KAZOO PLAYING IN MY EAR DOES NOT HELP. Thank you, Santa, for that particularly inspired gift in Elder Son's stocking. *facepalm*

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